A morning ride and a rap song

08 Sep 2005 03:03 pm
Yesterday morning was a strange one on the hill up to Orem.

I passed two people on bikes right before hitting the dreadedly steep hill. One was a girl on a mountain bike and the other was a middle-aged man decked out in full bike-riding uniform...spandex galore. He was on a racing bike, I passed him by luck because he was stopped at a stoplight and the light turned green in time for me to keep my momentum (I stuck my mind's tongue out at him as I whipped past).

So here I am approaching the hill with two people hot on my tail. This is where my competitive streak shines. The girl I'm not too worried about, but the guy on the racing bike I think might have a similar competitive attitude and try to prove he's better than the chubby kid on his mountain-bike by passing me. So, I kick it into a slightly higher gear than usual and start pumping like I'm the engine of a bicycle-powered electric boat.

As I'm ascending the hill, I keep hearing the tell-tale beat of the racing bike behind me creaking its chain as the pudgy dude tries to overtake me. It seems like it's getting closer...and...are his legs moving faster then mine? No, we're just about even meaning I can beat him if I just maintain my pace.

Now the beating of my heart drowns the clanking of his chain and I can't tell where he's at. Look back? No, that might slow me down and shift my balance out of the steady rythm I'm trying to keep up...just pedal harder I tell myself.

At this point I'm approaching the last, and steepest, section of the hill. My quads are burning and sweat is trickling off of me like a hippo in a sauna. I realize I can't keep my bike in the high gear I'm in for this last section so I risk downshifting just to complete the trek.

With my last ounce of strength I blast over the top of the hill...victory! Now to look back and provide my opponent with a sportsmanlike "good race" with a slight hint of gloating and smugness at the corners of my mouth.

I turn my head and feel the slight breeze from the top of the hill...only to see...no-one. The grass's freshly cut blood scent fills my nostrils as I realize I was being driven by the clanking of my own chain.

And I wrote (and performed) a rap about the brother of Jared over the weekend.